12 November 2010

Clueless in Alabama....

I don't know what I am gonna do. 

This is one of the toughest calls I have ever had to make.

The only thing that comes close was when I was the Captain for my neighborhood 3-man wiffle ball team (Go BlueJays) and I was faced with picking as our third player either Charlie Sharpe who was a talent, but was only 9 and not very fast, or Tony Moon who could've been the best player in the league if he applied himself, but didn't make the league a priority on Saturdays...he was hit or miss.

You know what...as tough as that was back when I was 15 (I chose Charlie, and we won the league going 17-1), this is waaaaaaaaaaaay tougher...

WHAT WILL I WEAR TO THE CONCERT SUNDAY NIGHT???

Surely you see the dilemma.

At first, I was thinking, ok, concert.  Jeans.  T-Shirt.  Old Worn Running Shoes.  Easy as cake...

I just got a nice pair of jeans for my birthday, and I look gooooooooood in them.  Then probably a t-shirt that has some cool logo.  Probably one from a skateboard company, or maybe from a blood drive.

Done deal.

I WISH!

This is a STEVEN CURTIS CHAPMAN concert.  See, that ups the ante a little because, hey, this is an icon of the contemporary Christian music scene.  He isn't a T-shirt kind of guy, right?  I think I am still good on the jeans (did I mention they look nice?)  T-shirt probably out.  Now I am thinking plain polo shirt...but untucked!  That is how us 40 year olds try to look cool these days!  Untucked shirts!!!  And my brown sandals would be more appropriate for Mr. Chapman's concert.  This isn't the Insyderz or Skillet.  This is for real.

Feelin' good about my choice.

Until...Uh-oh...another curveball.  The concert is in a CHURCH!  So now, what kind of church? 
Pentecostal? 
Non-denom? 
HA!  I can't be that lucky.  Instead I get the scariest, hardest to predict lot out there....SOUTHERN BAPTIST!

Now I have to research this!  Is this one of the high-church, tassle loafer SoBaps, or the radical, anything goes, shorts on Sunday morning SoBaps???  And how would I know?  They use the same people's pictures on their website that every other church uses.  This just got harder than ever! 

AND it is over an hour away!  Do I dress for comfort?  I am riding with the friends who GRACIOUSLY GAVE my wife and me tickets!  I won't be in control of the temperature settings in the van!  AGGGGGH!!!

PLUS they want to walk around a shopping center and eat at a nice restaurant before the concert...we are now talking possibly brown loafers and khakis???  Light weight sweater?  How about my Steven Curtis Chapman t-shirt I got from his "Great Adventure Tour" circa early 90's?!?!?! 

At some point, I am sure the words "What do I care, I will never see these people again?" will come out of me, at which point my loving, supporting, God-given help-meet will look at me and say "But you will have to see ME again" proverbially shot-blocking my freedom to dress out of the ordinary with cut off jean shorts and a tank-top!

OK....I think I have it...

Plain brown polo
Dark blue jeans (they look gooooooooood)
White leather K-Swiss shoes....

Yeah, I am ready....

Wait! 

I haven't even considered the WEATHER.......

4 comments:

  1. My vote is for those new jeans, brown dress shoes & belt (or black depending on shirt color); untucked vertically striped button down dress shirt w/o undershirt; leave the top two buttons undone; bring Members Only jacket in case of foul weather; matching dress socks; modest undergarments; no sunglasses, hat or fedora; 2 squirts of cologne (no more, no less); no gum chewing; optional lighter for concert waving; and finally, a pocket full of KJV tracts for those on-their-way-to-hell Southern Baptists.

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  2. And I thought women were the stereotypical ones to stress over "what do I wear?" Be glad you don't have to consider the additional options involving skirts, dresses, scarves, etc.! 8-)

    This is why I love Colorado. Jeans, sweater, shoes & socks (it's COLD out there), and I'm good to go.

    Have a great time!

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  3. I agree with with Joey. Dark jeans, button-up long sleeve, untucked. very stylish!

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  4. I agree with Karin. She was my fashion consultant for years until she had the nerve to grow up and move out! You can trust her to get these things right.

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